May 14th

Happy Anniversary to us!

You know, come to think of it, I think that was the last time anyone took a photo of the two of us together! Camera anyone?

Patience

We spent this morning trying* to install/re-install Norton's on Simon's laptop ~ he has a virus/pop-ups on there and it needs "something" ... god only knows what ... to a) get rid of the pop-ups and b) protect it for the future.

Part of the problem is that Simon really hasn't got the patience - you can hear his "theatrical sighs" when things take too long from downstairs/another room, he flounces off as soon as something doesn't work and then storms back to hover at my shoulder, grumbling and huffing as I try to help. Then he complains about the wasted time as if it is my fault that the laptop is no longer working, where as if he'd kept the anti-virus protection up to date we wouldn't be having this problem right now. My last suggestion - of popping the laptop along to the local repair shop was answered with "you just might as well throw it out."** Good grief!!! He really needs to a) calm down or b) take a chill pill in plenty of time in situations like this.

I on the other hand need a) advice on how to live with the most impatient man in Christendom or b) a gun. Lead me to SCD please - the sequins will make me feel better.

* No, not suceeding.

** "That's fine mate but we haven't got the money to buy another one and you're not using mine" is what I should have replied to that comment.

Help me Internet help me!

**UPDATE** The Mail on Sunday can't help me out with the recipe ... poof! Sheesh! Where next?

Last Christmas Tana Ramsay came up with a Cranberry Relish recipe in one of the Sunday magazines using a mixture of dried and fresh cranberries - bloody, bloody Simon threw the magazine out!!

Can you help Internet?

Join the "Bring Back Summer Campaign"

Looking through the office* window I can see another misty morning that reminds me so very strongly how far away summer is - it's cold, I'm wearing slippers and I'm wrapped in my dressing gown - though thankfully I haven't had to resort to putting the hood up. Yet! My hands, when they're not typing are wrapped around a cup of tea - my second - and I am considering going to find a pair of socks. I hate this weather, yeh ok Autumn looks pretty ... through the mist I can see golden leaves BUT it's just a taster of what's to come - a long cold, damp winter, with children cooped up inside the nursery. Bring back summer please. NOW!

* aka the pokey/3rd/back bedroom

Just one of the bizarre conversations that take place in this house ...

Yesterday morning I walked into the back bedroom to iron a t-shirt to find Simon wearing just boxers, sitting cross-legged on the floor drawing a triskelion in permanent black marker on golf balls.

Me - what the hell are you doing?

Him - Identifying my balls

Me - that's easy, that's *points* your left one, and that's *points again* your right one.

Well, you didn't expect me to pass up on the opportunity did you??

Yesterday was Simon's birthday - I allowed him the treat of cutting the lawn! It didn't come gift wrapped. He didn't say thankyou.

Some people are just never satisfied.

Broken any good bones lately?

Did I mention the toe?

Ah ... thought not ... I was trying to ignore and cancel out the waves of guilt, that's why!

So, here goes ~

I went out last Tuesday night to play poker and whilst I was out Simon kicked the bedstead on the way to bed in the dark. Apparently much swearing took place at this time along with treatment with a bag of frozen peas and 2 paracetemol and then ... he went to sleep.

The next morning his foot did look balloonesque in proportion, much hobbling was taking place and I did attempt to look concerned * and sympathetic ** but failed miserably. Luckily he'd booked a couple of days off *** so spent Wednesday with his foot up on the sofa. BUT he insisted on going to Tesco on Wednesday evening do I assumed that things were getting back to normal.

He had to have the car on Thursday to deliver some bits and pieces to friends of my parents who were passing on their way back to France and as he was bitching and moaning I did the "OH FOR GOD'S SAKE, well if it's still painful you'd better go up to A & E, that way you'll know nothing's wrong and you'll feel better as it's probably all in your mind!"

Ooops! *waves of Jo's guilt washes over t'Internet* Sorry!! Would some chocolate cake make it better?

BROKEN TOES!!

* Having been brought up by my mother I'm not good at concern ... she used to have trouble not laughing at us when we got hurt as kids.

** Having a recovering alcoholic father I'm used to the quote about sympathy coming between shit and syphilis in the dictionary and they're no use to us either!

*** Jealous as I'd just had a fortnight - teaching has to have some perks!

PhotoHunt :: Flexible

themes · about · participants

We were coming home from a party and there wasn't enough room in the car for Simon ... so we bent him in half and he fitted in the boot! He looks happy because it was a very good party ;o) Luckily there were no rozzers around.

Beyond Busy

This week has been spent at a flat out run ... well not actually at a flat out run but work has been at 90 miles an hour - no let up. We are expecting the OFSTED phone call - after which a team of inspectors will come in and inspect us. Look at the teaching, provison, attainment, progress, policies, behaviour, planning etc etc etc. As a member of the senior leadership team I know that I am going to be expected to answer questions for the inspectors - but at the moment I'm finding the constant need to be thinking about those answers wearing. I understand the reasoning behind it ... I don't want to be scrabbling around at the last minute, there'll be other things to do then*; it's just that I am fed up with it right now.

Teachers in the main part of the school have had Parent's Evening - you know the kind of thing "come in and talk about your child's progress/lack of progress" and eventhough we don't have these sessions in the nursery, I stayed in school to support an NQT on her first round of these fun sessions - this resulted in my eventually getting home at 8.15 last night. Show me a teacher who likes Parent's Evening and I'll show you a lost soul in need of Prozac or a brain transplant. Knackered. And then my body still wants me to wake up at 4.30am because 50 things are running around/through my head.

I'm sure that there are people out there who think that teaching is a nine to five quarter past three job, with weekends off and uber-long summer holidays. I don't have to justify myself to them - I wouldn't give up teaching for the world and I know what it's really like. Anyway, enough of the bitching and moaning about work, I need to do something to redress the work-life-balance problem I am suddenly up to my neck in.

So, this weekend I am going to take some time. For me. For us. Chilling. Yes, this weekend (as long as the weather plays ball), Simon and I will be mainly playing in the garden, putting the whole lot to bed. Cutting back - yes, I agree, it's probably the wrong time of year - mulching**, emptying hanging baskets, de-weeding, pruning the vine and tidying up.

Though why Simon is dressed like Old McDonald beats me and have you any idea how bad I would look in dungarees? I shall of course be holding a glass of shiraz rather than a bucket but I promise to dig a bit too :o)

* As soon as we get the phone call, we'll have to start trawling evidence to match the criteria on the prelimenary report that they'll send.
** I have no idea what mulching actually is, I just know that Alan does a lot of it on How to be a gardener.

p.s. Thanks to Mar for the unspoken heads-up about the pretty little picture in the middle! You can make yourself one here if you so wish!

All work and no play makes Jo a sad, sad sack

So, over the weekend, I worked.

Actually, I forgot on Saturday I took 2 hours off and went to Bluewater with Ruth - I love you Bluewater - and then I came home and worked.

If you know anyone even considering a career in teaching who wants a life, weekends, holidays to themselves tell them, no order them not to do it! You know it's not that I don't love the job - I adore the job BUT there's no work-life balance and a certain someone isn't half giving me stick about it!

Right, better leave it because I have to go and shower ... I am off to work soon :o(

p.s. Don't forget to go on over to That’s my answer!
The official question of the day — it’s your daily pitstop for questionable fun :o)

Open up and say aaagh!

I had to take a half day yesterday to take Simon to the dentist, for root canal work. This palaver of epic proportions first began last November, yep you heard me, last November when he first complained about toothache.

Me - Well go to the dentist then.

Simon - I can't.

Me - [brought up by my mother Vin, I am at this point showing not a scrap of sympathy*] What do you mean you can't? Why not?

Simon - I'm scared of the dentist.

And so he told me the story of his last dental visit 22 years ago - good grief, so long ago I hadn't even done my "O" levels and I feel like I've had them forever! Yes, 22 years ago when the dentist had removed a tooth and it was so bad** that his body went into shock and he spent a week in bed and ... his mother let him get away with this*** Knowing full well that this was a situation I wasn't going to put up I got him into a dentist that same week, to whom he retold the whole sorry tale.

Dentist - Oh I'm sorry Mr Langthorne, but we can't possibly do the work here if your body reacts like that. You'll need sedation and will have to go to a specialist clinic.

And being the procrastinator's procrastinator that he is, 4 lots of antibiotics and 11 months later that is where we found ourselves yesterday. And 25 minutes later I had to get him home. The sedation had the same effect as 14 rum and blacks on an empty stomach! I am 5' 6" ... he is 6' 2" and I had to manhandle him down the stairs of the clinic into the car and then home and into bed :o( He fell asleep in the car, couldn't work out how to get his feet up the stairs (I had to put my hands under his arse and shove to get him upstairs) and almost fell asleep again whilst leaning on the ironing board (in the spare bedroom) taking his trousers off. Good god!

This morning he looks like a chipmunk and can't remember a thing! I might take the teeth out myself if it happens again, with a lump hammer and a crow bar :o)

* As my father is so fond of pointing out sympathy comes between shit and syphilis in the dictionary ... and neither of those are any good for you either! This might me an AA saying, he's got plenty of them ;o)
** Now, and don't get me wrong but this might be "man bad" or rather "Simon hypochondria Langthorne bad" so we should probably take this with a grain or twelve of salt!
*** I don't think she has any real idea of the rod she has created for my back but I do bring this up with her as often as is humanly possible.

p.s. Simon - I am only teasing, well a little bit, well about the lump hammer :o)

A bit of a prattle

It'll be June soon and maybe it's the re-turn of warmth and sunny weather but I'm feeling a tad perkier! You ok too?

Saturday was Simon's mini-birthday party - that party which was to have been a huge celebration of friendliness that became instead a smaller yet still lovely celebration of family and friends who are close enough that they are really family-ness. We BBQ'd some pork, laughed and drank lots of beer - well they did. I drank lots of coke with the odd slosh of brandy and therefore was much soberer than people thought I was ;o)

School this week has been really hard (it's only Wednesday morning!) Yesterday I had to tell the current Foundation Stage Leader that actually she is out of a job for September ... and will be moving into another year group and she cried. And it made me feel like shit! But then I suppose with maturity the new job and the bigger pay packet, comes increased reponsibilities and more "feeling like shit-ness!" Hopefully today will be a better day - a sit under a tree and read a strory day, a build the tallest tower you can with LEgo day - that'd be a Jo kind of day.

Busy washing and ironing clothees last night as we're off to France on Saturday morning for a week of sun, sand and pintxos in St Jean-de-Luz - can't wait guys! Of course I shall have to lug the trusty lap-top with me so that I can get on with my school reports that have to be in by June 24th ... 52 of them to write this year which feels horrendous, but that is because I am right at the beginning of them. Right - here I go, have a good day.