Murder? Moi?

Did you hear about the teacher who was helping one of her nursery children put on his wellies. Even with her pulling, and him pushing, the little boots still didn’t want to go on. Finally, when the second boot was on, she had worked up a sweat. She almost cried when the little boy said, “Teacher, they’re on the wrong feet.” She looked, and sure enough, they were.

It wasn’t any easier pulling the boots off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to get the boots back on, this time on the right feet. He then announced, “These aren’t my boots.” She bit her tongue rather than get right in his face and scream, “Why didn’t you say so?” like she wanted to.

Once again she struggled to help him pull the ill-fitting boots off his little feet. No sooner had they got the boots off when he said, “they’re my brother’s boots. My Mom made me wear them.” Now she didn’t know if she should laugh or cry. She mustered up the grace and courage she had left, to wrestle the boots on his feet again.

Helping him into his coat, she asked, “Now, where are your mittens?” He said, “I stuffed them in the toes of my boots.”

Her trial starts next month!

PhotoHunt 103 :: High

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I have never made it all the way up that moutain but I have been all the way up to Andorra. That road you can see in the picture led high up into the Pyrenees.

This week I will mostly be ...

Monday - day off, thankyou Bank Holiday organiser man
Tuesday - school starts, lunchtime meeting to update/re-write school self-evaluation form, parent's evening consultations until 6.15 ... best friend comes to dinner (bright point!)
Wednesday - school, playground duty before school, reflection duty (detention) at lunchtime, parent's evening consultation appointments until 5.50, Governing Body meeting until 8.30, home to die
Thursday - school, parent's consultation appointments until 7pm (?????) 7-bloody-pm ... don't give me the flaming "oh I don't get home from London until then" shite-sob story!
Friday - mobile farm visit for 132 3-5 year olds, meeting before the school's improvement partner (read as v important Education Authority big-wig) comes to "inspect" us next week, followed by 2 more parent consultation appointments **UPDATE** ... will try to squeeze in dinner out with spouse.
Saturday and Sunday - sleep and remain too tired to converse with darling very unhappy spouse who thought he was marrying someone who had a job that included short working days, long holidays, a huge salary and no stress.

Oh yes, go into teaching if you too are looking for that short working days+long holidays+huge salary+no stress combo - NOT!

6 word memoir meme

I was tagged by Andy from Destination AndyLand to complete the 6 word memoir meme begun in February by bookbabie. The rules are as follows.

1. Write your own six word memoir
2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like
3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere
4 .Tag five more blogs with links
5. And don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play!

I could have gone with any number of these including ...
Scurrying madly trying to catch up ... or
Much too late to say no ... or
Teaching and hoping for awesome wonder ... or very up to date
No Easter eggs but not pouting ... or
Waiting patiently for the next meal ... but I finally decided on ...

Dreaming of a future French happiness

I am tagging ... Absolute Vanilla because as she is managing between 3000 and 5000 a day at the moment another six should be breezy; Fizzy because a microwaveable duck should be worth a word or six; Sophie because then we might get a memoir "en Francais et Anglais"; Naomi because it would be an enormous challenge for her to manage a 66 word memoir and get it all in nevermind a 6 word one!! And finally Fat Boy Fat - because he's just bloody funny and I need to draw his attention to the fact that there are 3 blokes in those photos in vertical stripes - chwarae teg nawr!!

What's cooking?

I cooked lamb shanks last Saturday night and my god they were delicious - browned off in the pan and then slowly braised for 5, yeah 5 hours; with carrots, onions, celery, fresh herbs and a mixture of red wine and stock. They were so tender, they fell apart and the only mistake (not mine I might add) was that we ate them with new Charlotte potatoes and not a big, oozy pile of buttery artery-clogging mash. Wouldn't you like a smell-a-vision version of t'Internet right now? It would do you no good as ... and I should be shot for this ... I didn't take any photos. Yep, no photos twice in one month, no photos in Wales, no photos of the best braised lamb shanks in the world ever.

So, on Friday afternoon when I decided to cook a curry from scratch I thought what a better way to make up for the lamb shanks than to share the tips imparted to me by Shisho on how to do curry without lining the pockets of Messrs Sharwood and Patak.

So, I started with 2 thinly sliced red onions which I fried in a little vegetable oil with 2 spoons (they are very tiny spoons in my masala dabba) of cumin seeds. Then I added some turmeric and some ground ginger & cumin - a spoon of each. And then a little more turmeric because it didn't look like there was enough. I let this all continue to fry for a couple more minutes over a low heat before adding some minced garlic and fresh ginger and then gave that a few more minutes.

This curry was always going to be just vegetables, so I chopped up a mixture of potatoes and green beans, opened a can each of chick peas and tomatoes and got mixing.

In went the potatoes, green beans and 2 spoons each of smoked paprika and garam masala.

And then it was the turn of the chick peas - drained and rinsed - plus the tinned tomatoes (and a tinful of water), 2 tsps of dried chilli (as the one in the fridge was more than a little past it's best), salt and pepper, the heat was turned up, the whole lot came to the "boil" and then it was turned down and left to simmer for 30 mins.

Meanwhile, the brandy and lemonade that you can see in the first picture way up there got drunk and another was poured. Rice was made - basmati rice, a little more cumin seed, some salt, the odd vegetable or two and some vegetable oil; fried for a minute or two before boiling water water was added and a tightly fitting lid that "is NOT removed to check/peak/stir for a full 10 minutes" * ... perfect vegetable rice.

So finally, after adjusting the seasoning with a little sprinkling of S&P, Simon and I settled down to a gorgeous plate of potato, chick pea and green bean curry with rice and a spoonful of tamarind, chilli yoghurt ... the picture of the finished dish, oh ... umm ... oops!

* Shisho is always very forceful about this!

Unconscious mutterings #268

I say ... and you think ... ?

Money :: cash
Unhappy :: sad
Joking :: What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Flip Flop ... well it makes me laugh!
Chipmunk :: Alvin and the chipmunks
Date :: 23rd
Slideshow :: Flickr
Chicago :: Illinois
Lifetime :: longtime ... I hope
Skid row :: at the very bottom
Edward :: Scissorhands

Do some Unconscious Mutterings of your very own.

Guess?

Go on, guess who has no central heating this weekend and is sitting here, as it snows and whilst the North wind doth blow with the front door wide open as a big machine pumps the sludge from the central heating system out through the front door and into the drain.

Go on have a guess!

And guess who's going to have to pay for the privelege too ;o(

PhotoHunt 102 :: Metal

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Now you could rattle your house keys around in that satisfactorally ... couldn't you?

A good name for a boy band

I love Ashes to Ashes - "All right Bolly Knickers!"

PhotoHunt :: I spy

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Ok, you can see the little yellow bird - that's easy. But can you spy it's nest?





Clicking on the picture enlarges the image making it much easier to see the dangling round nest.

Unconscious mutterings #267

I say ... and you think ... ?

Paranormal :: Ghostly happenings
Alarm :: Bells
Operative :: Agent
Changing :: Rooms
Framed :: Photo
Beer :: Festival
Referral :: Social Services
Unmasked :: Zorro
Movie star :: Audrey Hepburn
Handbook :: For my life - could do with one.

Do some Unconscious Mutterings of your very own!

Bread of heaven

Bread of heaven, bread of heaven
Feed me till I want no more (I want no more)
Feed me till I want no more.



Cymru am byth!

If I could ...

I'd pull up a stool, pour myself a glass and ask nana and gran what made them laugh. I bet it was a hell of a joke!!

Dear Tosser

For the attention of the owner of the white caravanette parked outside our house since Monday 25th February 2008

Dear Tosser

I know I don't own the piece of road outside the house.
I know that both you and I have a right to park on any public highway.
I know that you obviously don't give a shit about your vehicle even though it is taxed and I assume MOT'd.

But my parents are coming to stay again on Monday eve on their way back to France, the last time they passed through ... 10 days ago my father (who whilst sprightly is in fact 72 years young) had to carry his suit case up the road because you were parked outside my house where he could have parked!

"Chwarae teg nawr* good boy!"

Move it NOW !!

Best wishes
Jo

p.s. I have emailed the police (Sergeant Emma Satherly @ Kent Police is apparently my neighbourhood sergeant responsible for Gillingham north) to ask for advice - I hope she gets in touch with you.

* I'm feeling all Welsh today - translates as "Fair play now"

Tuesday morning thoughts

Did I tell you that nephew #3 has been chosen to play rugby for his district? Feeling very proud. Scored 2 tries on Sunday too - Nanny and Grandad were there to cheer him on!

Where did all that wind yesterday come from?

NO STOP, wait, don't give me chapter and verse about air movement, the Coriolis effect, low pressure, high pressure, prevailing Atlantic winds - I know all that honest; I did a geography and environmental studies with education degree. It's just that yesterday - where did all that wind come from? It kept coming and didn't stop. I swear it lifted one of our 3 year olds off her feet.

What's with Mastermind contestants?

Do you think theres a question on the application form that goes a bit like this ... Are you odd? Yes ... please continue. No ... sorry, your application will be rejected.

Why did I have to go on that course yesterday?

Why couldn't the member of the Senior Leadership Team who was originally booked on it attend? Why did I have to give up my non-contact time? Being the junior person on any team sucks.

Happy Tuesday you.

Unconscious mutterings #266

I say ... and you think ... ?

Homicide :: Murder
Divisive :: What?
Flash :: Bang, wallop!
Steaming :: Hot
Crunch :: Apple
Look out! :: Here I come!
Anticipating :: Wait for it
Slim :: Jim
Navel :: Orange
Help :: Scream

Do some Unconscious Mutterings of your very own!

Old photos

I spent this afternoon cheering over the Welsh win at Croke Park and scanning old photos - both gave me joy but for different reasons.









It cracks me up that in 2 of the 4 photos I'm eating ... some things never change. AND I'm dressed in white - that's not happening these days with my propensity for dropping food ~ my mother was so trusting.

Round-up

Back from Swansea ... great weekend BUT how wrong was I about the rain that I was bound to see being in Wales and all that - not that it didn't rain you understand, I was in Wales after all BUT it was at night.

I left work on Friday - pegged it down the M4, well tried to peg it ... driving rain (only in England), gale force winds and the M25 meant that a 230 mile drive took me 5 1/2 hours ... I have done it in just over 3 hours before now.

Arriving at my friend Marion's was lovely as I was welcomed with a big old bowl of Cawl Cennin, a glass of red TLC and a couple hours of gossip & chat. I think we eventually fell into bed at about 1am and I was out for the count in about 10 seconds flat. Saturday was a glorious day, Marion lives in a bungalow on the edge of the family farm so the views out of her window in the spring sunshine ... I'd show you BUT I forgot to take my camera with me - yeah I know, one friend has already called me a dufferdil - I probably deserve it.

So the rest of Saturday was spent in the bosom of family - all those things you miss when you're not with them all the time ... fighting, gobby teenagers / sarky little brothers (mine, not theirs) / kisses and cuddles from 2 1/2 year olds etc. We did fit in a trip down to the Mumbles where we strolled in the sunshine and ate ice-cream. What was really lovely was that there were littlies everywhere in Welsh costume, it being St David's Day and all that.

Of course after legging it back up the M25 on Sunday I had a stack of schoolwork to do - never mind at least I had Saturday off. Back down there again in April - I promise to take the camera next time.

In other news my parents arrive tomorrow evening - SHIT - I could have sworn I had a weekend to tidy-up before they came ... what do you mean I spent it swanning around in Wales??

Unconscious mutterings #265

I say ... and you think ... ?

Chemical :: Brothers
Poker :: Full house
Federal :: FBI
Mattress :: Bed
Who am I? :: I don't know, who are you?
Investigation :: Police
In good hands :: Safe
8:30 :: Work starts
Creditors :: Owe
Resource :: Free