Adding to the list

I have a list, it's short and unpalatable and today I am adding to it ...

It's the List of Things I don't want to eat again before I die. Up until today it consisted of tripe, blackcurrants, marzipan, rhubarb, goosberries, aniseed/liqourice and mango*. As of today you can officially add Westphalian Black Rye Bread. Why? Why? Why would anyone want to make a cheese sandwich out something that tastes/smells and has the consistency of sour Christmas pudding. Mother's Pride someone please!!!

* A short list I consider myself an omnivore.

So x2

So ... we're off today ... what a surprise, we're heading to France. No, wait I went to Spain in June so I do officially go other places for holidays. The best news is that I will not be back for a month. One whole month people! 31st July to 2nd September - I know *smiles smugly* a month +

You have Simon's full permission to flip me the bird, he's back on August 16th!!

Be good while I'm gone, play nicely and don't bother to try and find the key to raid the drinks cabinet ... I'm taking it with me.

Unconscious Mutterings #338

Not having had the Internet at home for the last 6 weeks or so I have missed my weekly unconscious mutter, 5 of them in fact ... not that Simon would say I've been quiet ... don't worry he'll pay for it!!

I say ... and you think ...

Banter :: chat
Amazing :: Grace
Towel :: bath
Cinema :: Odeon
Newspaper :: daily
Not good :: bad
My type :: tall and dark with nice hands!
Twinkle :: twinkle little star - all three verses!
Actress :: actor
Daft :: silly

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

So ......

Well, it looks like I was right after all, my blog was being read - but by someone from work. A someone who is in fact a colleague that I bitched and moaned about. And during a "challenging chat" two weeks ago when she accused me of divided loyalties and not sticking up for her* out it all came. And I hold my hands up - guilty as charged. Not of the divided loyalties BUT about venting about my job and the people I work with (BUT not the people I work for) on the Internet. So here's me private again. Not that I am about to vent because there's fiendishly clever people put there who can get past things like this - not that I think I work with anyone who'll manage that but all the same ;o)

In other news I have managed to get my laptop working online! Double whoop! In fact I think I shall probably be whooping about this for a while! Whoop! That'll teach me not to check the box in Internet Tools that says "never dial up a connection."

And with less than three weeks to go until France - there's another whoop for you!

*It should be noted that she hadn't "dressed herself in glory" as she'd been caught by the boss with a bucket of bleach and a just boiled kettle in a classroom of 5 year olds. Guess who's just been asked to take on whole school responsibilty for the devil that is "elfs and safefty" next year?

YAY!

A post - YAY!

Internet at home - YAY!

Back from the wilderness - YAY!

So ...

... you might be wondering what's been going on and what's happening to my posting or rather what's NOT happening!

Well, it looks like my PC has finally decided to die - which shouldn't be a big problem as I have a school laptop BUT my laptop will not allow me on the Internet at home! You can't imagine the hell that is no access to the Internet ... wait, you're blog surfing - you probably can.

Back as soon as I can be!

One working week, one hundred and one words

Monday need to meet leadership coach with team after school. Drop me in it, all J personalities. I’m too “it’ll get done/seize the moment.” Go home and drink gin.

Tuesday quiet - hallelujah.

Wednesday busy, colleagues at moderation. Goes well, unsatisfactory teacher thinks teaching good – NO! Proof our assessments good – not same thing.

Thursday student's observation bad. Need to ring tutor – failing. Student cries when I feedback. Other student gets job – proud mama! No gin at home. Argue with Simon.

Friday, realise in charge of school–heck! Student phones sick. 3 children on breakfast club roof. Go home via gin shop!

Last night's dinner

I got home from work last night with a head ache that I'd had all day and though HELL NO I am not cooking! SO we ordered a takeaway from the new Keralan/Goan takeaway that recently opened in Chatham - Coco Diner. 45 minutes later an intriguing smelling bag came through the front door ~

As a main course we ordered Kozhi Ishtew - tender chicken breast with vegetables in a coconut broth ... could have been hotter - and Attu Thakali Kari - slow cooked lamb with fennel and turmeric which was probably (along with the rice - how did it taste so good??) the star dish. The lamb was moist & tender and even with the over-laying flavour of the smoky spices and turmeric tasted of lamb.

Excitingly, the Coco Diner serves Dosa - paper thin rice or semolina pancakes sandwiched around a spicy potato filling, so we had one of those ... which came with 3 little pots of sauce - a spicy ketchupy mixture, a fermented prawn paste and something that looked like taramasalata kept 3 weeks too long. To round off the bread selection we also asked for a roti and a poori and 2 side dishes some batat keerai soung aka potato and spinach and some of the best raitha I've tasted in a long time.

Well ... what do I say? I eat a lot of northern Indian food, have my own masala dabba and always cook curries from scratch - thanks to cookery lessons from Shisho and Harpreet - this was unlike any curry I'd ever tasted. There were delicious flavours - the fennel with the spiced smoky lamb was genius BUT where was the heat and intensity? Where was the creaminess that coconut should impart? And finally the crispness was missing from the spiced, battered aubergine and king prawns we ordered to start. So, whilst I was incredibly glad that someone else did the cooking I don't think I shall be calling on the Coco Diner again anytime soon.

p.s. my saag aloo is better than theirs!!

Recently returned

Just back from Spain ... well, more like I'm back from Spain since last Sunday but the fug of post holiday blues has stopped me writing anything about it. However, having dragged myself away from the teetering edge of the pit of despair I can tell you that I had a fantastic time.

Between strolling along the waterline ...

finding iconic restaurant signs ...

spending time with friends ...

and dreaming about how I was going to get home, there was also time for some pretty delicious food. Hilights included tellines, razor clams pan fried with chorizo, pan con tomate y jamón, trinxat with griddled belly pork, zarzuela, Catalan broad beans - with botifarra negra (black pudding) and belly pork, escalivada and the odd dish of seafood paella.

Unconscious Mutterings #332

I say ... and you think ... ?

Hockey :: sticks
Twirling :: whirling
Montreal :: Canada
Better :: safe than sorry *wink*
New :: rope ?? What? It just popped in there!
Rally :: car
Stanley :: knife
USB :: drive
Scouted :: spotted
Cough :: and sneezes spread diseases

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

Unconscious Mutterings #330 and 331

I say ... and you think ... ?

Lisa :: B
Hope :: Floats
Irene :: ?? Who do I know called Irene? Gosh names are hard!
Tony :: Hart
Anna :: Maria
Dolly :: Parton
Laura :: niece
Debbie :: cousin
Wilson :: Beach Boys
Paula :: Abdul

And then on to the 2nd one I missed - why do I always push for as long a holiday as possible and come home knackered? Yeh, I know - unanswerable question!

Nursery :: work
Side effect :: reaction
Heart to heart :: chat
Try :: harder
Hog :: Harley
Symptom :: sneeze
Collide :: crash
Fury :: anger
Incorporated :: mixed-up
Summer :: here

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

Oh no!

pastries, originally uploaded by Laquet.

I never ever want to come back from a holiday ... can you think why?? Can you?

An apology to the Internet

Dear Internet

So sorry I've been crap at staying in touch and keeping you up to date BUT ... just plain knackered. I've started to write this blogpost 3 times and fallen asleep in the chair! I know, I know, anyone would think 69 not 39!!

So ... how's you? Thankyou by the way for allowiing me to cry again and again whilst listening to and watching Jamie Pugh on Britain's Got Talent - truely lovely and while we are at it "bugger me BUT Simon Cowell has fabulous teeth!"

So, been busy, busy here. Audits and interviewing for new teachers, pressure, pressure, reports, SATs (standardised assessment tests), more pressure ... been waiting for the end of term and it's been a long time coming!! So as I am now awake that means no more getups (school ones that is) for 9 days - whoop!! Off to Spain tomorrow morning for a week. Meeting up with my parents for a couple of days of sun, sea and seafood - bring it on! Simon obviously doesn't get the amount of time off that I do so is staying home - I'll miss him BUT sun+sea+seafood+Spain vs Simon .... I'll be back in a week!

Luckily his job is holding out - the building trade has been hit here BUT he seems to be ok. In fact they are still getting bonuses so they are obviously meeting their targets. Thankfully he's been given 2 weeks off in the summer so we'll be in France from July 3rd.

Righty, need to get ready for school, have a good one

xx

Unconscious Mutterings #329

I say ... and you think ... ?

Vex :: annoy
Relapse :: go backwards
Twinkle :: twinkle little star - hey I teach nursery!
Crawls :: pleads
Optimistic moment :: few and far between
Cage :: Nicolas - yum
Superwoman :: I wish, more like Knackeredwoman ;o)
Personal :: private
Vapor :: surely you mean vapour
Grocery store :: Tesco

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

Thanks Mother Nature

That's just peachey!

Rain, rain and more rain.

May = summer you know!

May 14th

Happy Anniversary to us!

You know, come to think of it, I think that was the last time anyone took a photo of the two of us together! Camera anyone?

Scenery and singing

Two weekends ago I had a lovely day with Kevan driving and then strolling through beautiful East Sussex (who knew England was SOOOOOOOOOO gorgeous) before joining the Langthorne ladies for dinner, fizz and some dodgy karaoke (who knew we were all SUUUUUUUUUUCH bad singers). It was a grand weekend!

The Belle Tout lighthouse at Beachy Head

The cliffs at Birling Gap

My niece Laura

Helen (Laura and Cat's Mum)

On the right Helen (my sister-in-law) and my niece Cat

Unconscious Mutterings #327 & #328 - playing catchup

I say ... and you think ... ?

Avoid :: no where near
Castle :: Windsor
Episode :: one
Limited :: availability
Nail polish :: toes
Dip :: houmous
Share :: between two
Damage :: broken
Improper :: *wink* naughty
Handle :: door knob

Again :: again
Shower :: long, hot
Flirting :: always
Moving on :: *singing* up, nothing can stop me
Rachel :: 's hair
Chips :: with fish
Texting :: sms
Feel better :: soon
Cashmere :: pashmina
Sucked :: lollipop

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

My niece Laura, voice of an angel ...

Laura, originally uploaded by Laquet.

... the angel of death!! Turn up the sound people because you know you want your ears to bleed!!

At last I write something - even if it's only a meme

Tagged by Ms AV and the Novapulsian chicken – a meme … thank god for a meme, because I have nothing else to write about!

What are your current obsessions?
Getting the curry “just right!”
This damned PC which keeps switching itself off any whip-stitch and then makes me change the fuse/wait hours before it’ll restart!! The fuse isn’t blown – I re-use it the next day when it happens all over again!!
Writing (26 of my own) and then proof reading (112 of everyone in my department’s) school reports as absolutely no way am I taking them to Spain.

Which item from your wardrobe do you wear most often?
Black trousers and t-shirt (I am under the misapprehension just like millions of other British women that black makes me look thinner than I really am - I should listen to Trinny and Susannah more) to work.
Jeans and a plain v/scoop neck (I listen to Trinny and Susannah some of the time!) t-shirt at weekends – so much more exciting to me than anyone else as this time last year I didn’t have jeans that fitted!

What's for dinner?
Last night was carrot and cauliflower curry, it was very nice. I tasted it and thought “gosh nothing to change” – that’s a first.

Last thing you bought?
A plane ticket to Gerona (the one in Spain – hopefully!)

What are you listening to?
Birds, the computer whirring and Simon snoring in the background.

If you were a god/goddess who would you be?
One who controlled the sunshine and let it rain only at night.

Say something to the person who tagged you:
Nikki I am gutted that I don’t think I am going to make it to the RFH – what bad planning on our parts that you’ll be in London when I am in Spain and I’ll be back in the environs of London when you’re in Spain! Just thoughtless of us both!! Here’s to the next time eh? Hope you have a ball whilst you’re here.

Favourite holiday spots?
Umhlanga, KZN, South Africa. St Jean de Luz, 64, France. Roses, Costa Brava, Spain.

Reading right now?
Re-reading the Belgariad by David Eddings.

4 words to describe yourself.
Right now – sleepy, hungry, not ready.

Guilty pleasure?
Vanilla ice-cream with hot chocolate sauce.

Who or what makes you laugh until you’re weak?
My mother – she sets me off and I’m done for.

First spring thing?
Well it’s summer, or at least last Thursday/Friday we thought it might be summer. Looking out of the window this morning though it looks like winter is back with a bang.

Planning to travel to next?
Roses on the northern Costa Brava at the end of the month.

Best thing you ate or drank lately?
Last night’s curry was good.

Flower of the moment?
I love all flowers, all the time (you listening Simon?) except chrysanthemums which a) I can’t spell and b) remind me of funerals – especially the coppery coloured ones.

Favourite ever film?
The Shawshank Redemption followed closely by Steele Magnolias.

Care to share some wisdom?
Laugh everyday.
Tell the people that you love, say the words aloud, so they don’t forget and neither do you!
Life is too short to drink cheap red wine!

Ok, so who should I scream "tag you're it" at? All of you - that's who!

Unconscious Mutterings #326

I say ... and you think ... ?

Soul :: man
Fold :: washing
Breakup :: relationship
Will :: Young
Fond :: ant
Powers :: super
ho-hum :: *twiddles thumbs*
Hustle :: "Do the hustle! *duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-du-du-du-duh*"
Avenue :: Warwick
Tower :: -ing Inferno!

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

A little trivia ...

At five minutes and six seconds after 4 AM on the 8th of July this year, the time and date will be ........ 04:05:06 07/08/09

This will not happen again for a thousand years.

I know, I know, evidently and obviously useless information in a blog post BUT trust me when I say "I have nothing better this week!"

Unconscious Mutterings #325

I say ... and you think ... ?

Lease :: hold
Dead :: quiet
Removed :: taken away
Broke :: fix
Lips :: kiss
Flight :: holiday
Three hours :: sleep :o(
Give :: take
Technical :: geeky
Hurry :: up!

Wanna play? Well, pop over here and do some muttering of your very own!

It certainly knows how to storm

Wednesday's weather

wednesday weather, originally uploaded by Laquet.

I fear that tomorrow doesn't look good whether we're staying here or heading for home. It doesn't even look good if we say "sod 'em! We're not going back even if we're skint and Simon has to go back to work on Thursday!!" and head for Gerona instead - pah!

Unconscious Mutterings #324

I say ... and you think ... ?

Animal :: magnetism
Temporary :: filling
Moan :: and bitch
Rapid :: quick
That’s for me to say :: !!! Ok!
City :: London
Bumper :: car
Eclipse :: lunar
Problematic :: situation
If? :: a picture paints a thousand words, then why can't I paint you?

Do some muttering of your own here.

Reads at Faversham part 2

I realise that if I was any kind of a real foodie that I would have had my fantastic food and photos all written up and posted on Sunday morning - right after my visit to Reads - BUT there's been problems with the faithful old warhorse of a PC chez moi. Every time I turn on a TV channel ... iPlayer, Channel4 Catch Up or ITV.com (well who'd miss Coleen's Real Women?) - poof, it/the fuse dies!!

So my strange but satisfying addicition to Supernanny and a series of "big poofs" have killed off any chance of finishing the review! Yes, that last sentence was for comic effect - what about it? Just enjoy the food photos why don't you??

Discs of deliciously light seafood mousse in a feuilette of puff pastry, with al dente asparagus and a butter sauce.

Ham hock terrine with piccalilli and warm sourdough toast.

Halibut on a bed of spinach and fennel ribbons with a herb gnocchi, cheese gougere and bisque sauce.

Lamb on buttered savoy cabbage with fondant potato a rosemary jus and roasted garlic served with sprouting broccoli and hollandaise.

The cheese basket - a selection of English and British cheeses with a variety of crackers and homemade bread with the best (ie saltiest farm churned butter) you've ever tasted!

Rhubarb souffle, lemon tart with a blackcurrant coulis, rhubarb ripple ice cream and coconut ice with a mango dab - yep that's right 4 desserts! Count them - 1, 2, 3, 4!

Right, now that I've wiped away the dribbles, I'd better go and have a bite to eat! p.s. Anyone know what might be wrong with my PC??

Reads at Faversham part 1

Last Saturday night I joined the other ladies in the poker coven and off we trooped to Reads at Macknade Manor, Faversham for a slap-up-meal out of the proceeds of the poker pot - we've been collecting since July 2007 and in huge anticipation we were all looking forward to the "Tasting Menu!" Two of our number had visited previously but Chris, Suzanne and I were Reads' virgins there on the recommendations of both Brid and Tracy.

No sooner had we arrived than we were shown into the elegant and comfortable drawing room. Lovely, quietly faded couches and armchairs, quietly hovering without being in your face waiters with cute French accents. We were quietly offered menus to peruse and decided on the tasting menu. Once we'd ordered, menus were replace with glasses and nibbles - their words not mine, as they were amazingly superior to what nibbles are in my mind!

Anchovy dotted cheese straws, sizzlingly hot 2-bite Welsh rarebits made with really pokey cheese and delicious olives. A good start!

After requesting a 15 minute break between each course we were shown to our table where we were offered a choice of black olive, white sourdough or pecan & raisin bread. The butter was patted and sprinkled with flaky sea-salt if that wasn't good enough on it's own - and trust me the pecan/raisin bread was - then something arrived to dunk the delicious bread into. We were presented with cup-fulls of delicious carrot and orange soup with just enough miniature croutons to get you to beg (knees were considered) for more! The orange hit just the right note - citrus without too much punch. For the first time in the evening I realised how lucky giraffes are to have such a long tongue!!

Unconscious Mutterings #323

I say ... and you think ... ?

Log :: cabin
Plaything :: toy
Broom :: witch
Heels :: killer
Smoke in :: smokin'
Guests :: for dinner
Attraction :: animal
Shiny :: bling
Risked :: everything
Velvet :: Underground

Do some muttering of your own here.

So NOT going without

The credit crunch as we all know is biting. But even with the nips at our heels smarting/stinging there are things that I can't do without. I know I could use the money better in other ways but I'd be so bloody depressed if I didn't have my little luxuries that would it be worth going on?? Unsurprisingly to most of you, many of the things on my list are edible - who'd have guessed it eh?
BUT some of them aren't.

Pedicures
Pata Negra from the deli in Gravesend
Green and Black chocolate
Fresh shellfish every Friday
Yves Saint Laurent's Touche Eclat
Asparagus and tenderstem broccoli
Aussie Miracle Moist shampoo and conditioner
Brioche
Coco de Chanel
Carte Noire - for when I have to drink instant
Food porn - such as Delicious or Olive

So, tell us, regardless of the crunch what are you so NOT going without?

In which Jo begs the Internet** to help her!

Gosh I need help!
Questions.
That's what I need - lots and lots of questions!

As you may or may not know I ask questions over at That's My Answer and being off to France next week AND after hearing that little French commune has lost bloody Internet again!* I need to post 9 questions for next week and nine for this week. Phew!! Now I am as nosey curious as the next woman BUT how the heck am I going to come up with 18 questions before Wednesday?? Come on Internet** ... help me out!

*Yep, available and luxurious for a week, power cut yesterday morning and gone again!
**Please note FBF and Indigo, that's me saving kittens twice in 1 post!

Post #1000

Who'd a thunk it?
1000 posts.
I never keep anything going this long ... and yet I've managed to get Chez le Laquet to carry on limping along since February 2005.

I remember the bizareness of my first comment ... about chilled consomme. Managed to write 100 bizarre and unrelated things about myself in a strange list - twice! Panicked about the wedding preparations. Found scarred beauty in the playground. I had a hen night and got married. Started my first meme - that I am actually still doing! And that was just 3 months in 2005!

There are times when I am sick to death of posting and can think of NOTHING to say but then there are also times when I have been able to use the blog to rant my arse off! I have made some really good friends and as of yet I haven't been Dooced ... I'm keeping my fingers crossed on that one! All in all I think I'm up for keeping this going for a while - hey maybe I'll even manage a few more posts than last year* ... shouldn't be too hard!

* aka the year of the SLACKER!

Making sweet music

Everyone's doing this - I've seen it in at least one/two/three different places and now so must I ... so here are the rules::

1. Go to Wikipedia's random article function, on the upper left sidebar: the title of your article is your band's name.
2. Go to Wikiquote. Once again, there is a "random page" function. Take the last four or five words of the random page and create your album name.
3. Now for the album cover. Go to Flickr Interesting photos from the last 7 days. The third photo is your cover, whether you like it or not.
4. Put it all together with something like Photoshop and become the newest rock star on the block!

I imagine Stockholm Party a little like Scritti Politti - left wing, post punk and slightly fey BUT from Sweden and not Leeds/Cardiff. Off to load the album onto my iPod ;o)

A is for apples

**Health warning - convoluted paragraph approaching** First let me explain that this in an idea that I've been fiddling with for a while now ... I have been equally inspired by an American Blogger who has lived for years in the Aveyron (and a French blogger who now lives in the US that Mrs America in the Aveyron reads!) Of course this immediately struck a chord with me because my parents live in the Lot (read just next door to Mrs A in the A) and in fact when I fly to see them I fly into Rodez (Aveyron), which is in fact just up the road from a quaint, dodgy-Broadband suffering, French commune containing a small dwelling - with a new & fab soon to be visited patio - that they call Chez le Laquet!

Anyway, back to the whole point of this ... welcome to my A to Z of Food and today A is for Apples! I have to admit that I am ambivalent about apples - I can love and loathe them on the same day. None of the "apples are my favourite" days of my brother's childrhood - I'd have preferred a handful of grapes or cherries. None of the "Lidl didn't have Pink Ladys only Jonagolds, so I walked 3 miles in the snow to Waitrose to get some" zeal of my mother-in-law - who knew that there were crossed apples? That a Lady William crossed with a Golden Delicious gave you a Pink Lady - and for that matter, who cared?? And don't even get me started on the nasty sweet muck they call apple juice - bleugh!

All through childhood apple pie and apple strudel were turned down in favour of pretty much anything. Scrumping in neighbour's gardens - I was too scared of getting caught. Baked apples - not a chance. Until finally, someone thought to introduce me to the joy of Normandy Pork!

Saint Delia's Normandy Pork (with Jo's twist)

Ingredients
100g apple sauce
1 apple*, chopped
1 teaspoon oil
1 teaspoon butter
1 medium onion, chopped
1 lb (450 g) shoulder of pork
8 fl oz (225 ml) dry cider
2 fl oz (55 ml) cider vinegar
salt and freshly milled black pepper
2 rounded tablespoons half-fat crème fraîche

Pre-heat the oven to gas mark 3 (170ºC).

First of all, cut the pork into 11/4 inch (3 cm) cubes. Then, heat the oil and butter in a 9½ inch (24 cm) shallow, ovenproof pan or casserole and cook the onion and in it over a medium heat for 5 minutes, stirring now and then. Then increase the heat and add the cubes of pork and stir over the heat for a couple of minutes. The pork doesn’t need to be browned, just lightly coloured.

Next, add the apple, then the cider, cider vinegar and a generous seasoning of salt and freshly milled black pepper. Bring everything up to simmering point and then transfer the pan or casserole to the oven and cook, without a lid, for an hour, by which time the liquid will have reduced considerably.

Then, stir the apple sauce and the crème fraîche and return to the oven, again without a lid, for a further 15 minutes.

That's tonight's dinner sorted then - photo to follow :o)

* You know by this point that I don't really mind what kind it is - my M.I.L. on the other hand would be most specific!

What happenend to the mics?

What happenend to the mics?, originally uploaded by Laquet.

What is going on with word verification words? They're getting realler and realler! And how do Annie and Dave feel about this one?

Unconscious Mutterings #322

I say ... and you think ... ?

Road trip :: Here to France
Pool hall :: Dark and smoky
Extraordinary :: different
Jackson :: Five
Heartfelt :: important
Wet :: pathetic
Strangle :: cord
.com :: dub dub dub dot facebook dot
Touched :: not quite right
Insipid :: flavourless

Do some muttering of your own here.

Playing catch-up

Simon and I have decided to go to France for Easter - he just needs to get on with it and book holidays now. He has to ask for the time off that I have told him to ask for first before accepting what he thinks he will be given - I know, cryptic BUT I know what I mean!! We do need to go, to inspect the new patio if for no other reason!

I have taken photos for yesterday 81/365 on the other blog BUT am very bad at posting them on/in time ... how do I get around this?? No, I have no idea either!

Posting will be worse when I get to France BUT **major drum roll** the sleepy French village now has Broadband that WORKS! Hurrah! And how long long did that take?*

Brush teeth before moisturing hands - you can't get any traction on a toothbrush with E45 cream on your hands!!

Child Protection Training today at The Friars! Training and monks and the relics of St Thérèse of Lisieux all in one day! Sister Philomena would be so proud! I'm not enthralled by the thought of lunch - I bet friars are parsimonious and think dry bread and water are sufficient if God is with you. You know and I know that I'm sooooooooooo not a dry bread and water kind of girl! I couldn't even be a dry bread and water kind of girl if it was artisan organic sourdough and San Pellegrino ;o)

*Interjection of small **NOTE TO SELF** Your mother may now be reading your blog again - be aware, very aware!!

Unconscious Mutterings #321

I say ... and you think ... ?

Studio :: 54
Meetup :: date
Ostrich :: feather
Jokes :: "Knock knock!"
Estranged :: separated
Random :: The four largest islands of Japan are Honshū, Hokkaidō, Kyūshū and Shikoku. Random enough for you?
Slap :: rouge
Hotel room :: bed and balcony
Inscribe :: write
Polar :: bear

Do some muttering of your very own here.

More in the neverending list of notes to self

Fact - the low energy bulb in the bathroom is crap. Fact - if you put make-up on in the morning in the bathroom with that bulb you will look like Coco the Clown. Simon only put the bulb in because it was free! **Note to self** Change lightbulb whilst HE is not looking.

Parents arrive this evening on way back to France. **Note to self** Put dishwasher on before you leave for school or you'll get the "what did I raise" look from your mother again!

I don't know why I suddenly feel like I've been kicked whilst I'm down, run over by a 4 wheel drive and left for dead on a deserted road BUT oh boy it's only Wednesday and I am knackered! Where's my get up and go gone too? I could do with a nap (at 7am) or a holiday ... please stop the world I want to get off!! **Note to self** Enough Joanne - sleep!

My weekend 101 words

Finished work 5.45 … I ask you?? Sausage pasta for dinner. Watched Comic Relief, cried! Saturday woke early, Simon to Tesco. Hoovered, cleaned bathroom … domestic goddess I am – not. Chicken Kiev for dinner, unfinished – Simon hoovered up that. Bed 10.30. Woke at 8, toasted bagel with Philadelphia & grapes. Farmer’s market in Rochester. Tasted everything offered. Persuaded Simon to join in!! Rare breed sausages, duck rillettes, Jerusalem artichokes, lime & chilli jelly. Tasted Thai chilli sausages – blew head off! Home sausage baguettes for lunch. Simone visited. Chilli pork noodles for dinner. Asleep sofa missed #1 Ladies Detective Agency – thankyou iPlayer.

Unconscious Mutterings #320

I say ... and you think ... ?

Sunburn :: moisturiser
Aquarium :: fish
Otter :: fish
Awesome :: fab.U.lous
LOL :: snigger
Accordion :: France
Hot Pocket :: hot hand
Grandstand :: Dickie Davies
Shaved :: razor
Upgrade :: better

Do some muttering of your own here.

My boring life!

Nothing going on really ... had a haircut, parents came bearing goodies, governing body meeting, school ... at least I've been "tweeting!" Off to stir up some trouble **wink**

@PreciousParcels - Loving your gifts website - fabulousness abounds!
12:16 PM Mar 10th from TweetDeck

@msmac Snap - I don't think spellcheckers help
12:01 PM Mar 10th from TweetDeck in reply to msmac

@msmac Never eat cake eat salmon sandwiches and remain young - works for me every time! Mind you my spelling is crap!
11:24 AM Mar 10th from TweetDeck

@msmac How about occasion ... only choice cuts and steak in our nook?
11:21 AM Mar 10th from TweetDeck

@msmac You need a mnemonic like the one for necessary
11:16 AM Mar 10th from TweetDeck in reply to msmac

Simon's got a bucket ... panic not Joanne!
7:02 AM Mar 10th from TweetDeck

Shit - porch roof leaking!
6:58 AM Mar 10th from TweetDeck

Loving the French goodies that have arrived - warm lentil and lardons salad for lunch today, mix in the leaves when I'm ready to eat!
6:52 AM Mar 10th from TweetDeck

coffee, coffee, coffee
6:46 AM Mar 10th from web

Unconscious Mutterings #319

I say ... and you think ... ?

Mourning :: sadness
Approval :: given
Lotion :: body
Pespire :: hot
Language :: French & Anglais
Defection :: spy
Play :: game
Graphic :: explicit
Spicy :: chilli
In love :: I want to be in love with life!

Do some muttering of your own here.

To do list

Strip and remake spare bed.
Get washing done.
Clean bathroom.
Hoover - bleugh!
Get into town to buy some lamb.
Weekly shop at Tesco.

And all because my parents are coming - hurrah! *
See there's a silver lining to every cloud :o)

* That makes me sound like such a dirty mare - I would do all of these jobs regardless whether they were coming or not!

It's the March Monthly Mingle over at That's My Answer ~ pop over and mingle for all you're worth why don't you!

Way back when ...

I found this floating around Facebook - feel free to steal it if you're (like me) struggling to think of anything interesting to say ...

Do you remember where you were 15 years ago? **1994**
1) How old were you? 24
2) Who were you dating? A Scottish bus driver called Andy
3) Where did you work? The Cothi Bridge Hotel
4) Where did you live? Carmarthen
5) Where did you hang out? The Golden Lion public house and the Union Bar
6) Did you wear contacts and/or glasses? Yep
7) Who were your best friends? Kev, John and Hannah
8) How many tattoos did you have? 0
9) How many piercings did you have? 2
10) What kind of car did you drive? A blue Ford Fiesta
11) Had you been to a real party? Yep, one or two
12) Had you had your heart broken? Yes
13) Were you Single/taken/Married/Divorced? Taken
14) Any Kids? No

10 years ago? **1999**
1) How old were you? 29
2) Who were you dating? No one
3) Where did you work? Hoo
4) Where did you live? Gillingham
5) Where did you hang out? At Ruth's dining room table
6) Did you wear contacts and/or glasses? Glasses
7) Who were your best friends? Kev, Ruth and Su
8) How many tattoos did you have? 1
9) How many piercings did you have? 2
10) What kind of car did you drive? A yellow Fiesta called Percy
11) Had your heart broken? Yes
12) Were you Single/Taken/Married/Divorced? Single
13)Any Kids? No

Today? **2009**
1) Age? 39
2) Where do you work? Northfleet
3) Where do you live? Gillingham
5) Who are your closest friends? Kev, Ruth and Su
6) Where do you hang out? Home - what a boring old mare I am
7) How many piercings do you have? 2
8) How many tattoos? 1
9) What kind of car do you have? A Renault Clio
10) Had your heart been broken? Yes, but not recently.
11) How many kids? 0
12) Are you Single/Taken/Married/Divorce? Married
13) Do you were glasses or contacts? Yes, both.

What about you ... do you remember where you were?

OFFICIALLY fabulous

I read (and love) the blog of Laura a transplanted Canadian in California ... and it seems that she loves me too ~aww~ and deems us both "fabulous darling!" Here's my award to prove it -

Laura wanted me to explain what fabulous meant to me.

God I wish I looked as fab as the picture - as Audrey Hepburn as her. There's were I am starting with fabulousness, the divine Audrey Hepburn. I've never seen a film of hers - and I've seen lots of them - where she doesn't look fabulous. Those cheekbones, the clothes, the grace. If only ...

Then there's foie gras. Now there are many people out there who would see me shot for eating a food that they consider as cruel as this. Why?? Well, during a process called gavage, duck or geese are force fed corn to un-naturally fatten their livers. There are celebrity chefs who won't cook it because they think it's cruel ... BUT give me a slice of pan-seared (poëllé) foie gras on brioche toast with some onion jam or Sauternes jelly and I am yours. Fab.u.lous darling!!

Other small bits of fabulousness chez Jo include ...
My wedding diamonds.
Sunday morning lie-ins.
My best friends.
Poker with the girls - I never manage to go the night without laughing until I cry.
Walking along the promenade in San Sebastian and then going for pinxtos.

So, there are a few things you need to do after accepting this award:
1.) Post the logo on your blog.
2.) Pass it on to your blogger friends.
3.) Please link the awardees in your post.
4.) Let your awardees know you have passed this on to them by going to their blog and leaving a comment.

Right in the spirit of t'Internet I am passing this on to other fabulous blogs/bloggers, so, **drum roll** in purely alphabetical order, the award goes to ...

Fi over at Fizzy's Place, she doesn't post as much as she used to but when she does she makes me laugh/choke/both.
Fi at Kiwifruit, great pictures and great writing ... I only wish I had her talent and something more like her digital camera.
Betty C at La France Profonde, pictures, France, food at the Cuisine Quotidienne (which is a little quiet these days but a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do) and finally And So Forth ... currently enjoying a bit of Ray Davies.
Tina enjoying Life in the slow lane at Squirrel Head Manor, Tina and I share a love of food - pretty much any food and an appetite. One day we're going eat together - she'll arrive on a Harley!
La Bella Stella at Ms Mac, just fabulous!
Honourable mentions also go to Around Britain with a Paunch - whose food makes me dribble -, Make Lard History - who makes me cry laughing - and finally Rashbre - whose commute makes my eyes water - who all probably think this award is to girlie - but I think they're fab!

Unconscious Mutterings #318

I say ... and you think ... ?

Pain :: relief
Lego :: love it
Trooper :: Starship
Flicker :: candle
Character :: Gibbs
Determined :: decided
Wing :: tip
Control :: freak
Automatic :: no gears
Yeah :: Hell yeah!

Do some muttering of your own here.

Dydd Dewi Sant Hapus iawn

What other way is there to celebrate St David's Day than tucking in to a big bowl of cawl cennin. Internet meet Jo's cawl cennin, cawl cennin meet the Internet!

I would go so far as to say that there isn't a Welshman or woman out there who doesn't like cawl* you'd be mad not to love it's lamby/leeky/brothy sweetness especially when served with a chunk of really good steam baked Swansea batch and a chunk of cheddar** Writing this post is making me salivate/dribble simply at the thought of it.

I use my Auntie Marg's recipe. First I think I need to explain about Auntie Marg is not really my auntie; in fact, she is no relation at all to either my mother or father who are both in fact only children BUT she is instead that strange phenomena that was all over Wales in the mid 70s, when children were brought up jointly (particularly during long school holidays) by their own parents and the parents of every other child on the street and indeed by neighbours who didn't even have children at home anymore.

If Andrew and I were out and about playing with Anna-Maria (see above) or Richard or Lynwen/Gareth/Bethan or any of other children around and their parents were feeding them, then they fed us too. Or just as likely if Anna-Maria was in our garden when Andrew and I had lunch - well, she stayed (see above). And because of this - maybe it is a Welsh thing after all - these people became honorary, much loved, aunties and uncles. We knew them too well to call them Mr or Mrs. It would have been forward of us as little children to call them by their christian names so Uncle Gino***, Auntie Pat, Uncle Dil and Auntie Marg it was!

Anyways, back to the recipe, except that there isn't really a true recipe, Auntie Marg just kind of made it up as she went along BUT it goes a lot like this.

1) In your biggest saucepan place a shoulder of mutton**** and cover with water. Add a bouquet garni - yes she really did but it was a rustic looking one, not one of those nice little tea-bags from the supermarket. This was more like an onion with a bay leaf, carrot and some celery, tied together in a bit of muslin with string/strong cotton. Turn on the gas/electric and bring to the boil and then turn it down and let it simmer, removing any scum until the meat is falling off the bone. Then (and this really is an important step) turn off the gas, put a lid on the pot, walkaway from the stove and leave the whole thing alone over night. NO PEEKING!

2) Come morning there will be a disc of yellow fat on top of the soup - take this off and discard it. Little bits will be left behind - that's fine, just discard the majority of the fat. If you leave it in, it tastes too strong and coats your mouth with too much fat. Discard the bouquet garni - it's done it's job too. Take the lamb out of the stock and shred it off the bone. Return to the broth. At this point I discard the bones - I don't think there's anything else I can do with them is there?

3) At this point Auntie Marg always threw in a handful of red lentils. The only "thickener" in the broth/soup. Turn the gas back on and bring to the boil once more, now turn it down to a rolling simmer. Leave for 20 minutes.

4) Now is the time to add your vegetables - leeks obviously ... it is cawl cennin after all; after a thorough wash the green and white parts of the leeks are sliced but not finely, your making a stew not a soup ~ there needs to be texture to them. Onion - sliced, similar to the leeks. Carrots - again sliced not to fine. Parsnips - cut into bite sized pieces. Make sure there's enough water to cover the vegetables stir well and leave.

5) After about 40 minutes when the vegetables are soft to the touch, check the seasoning and add a big handful of chopped parsley.

6) Serve piping hot with a bread to dip and a good wedge of cheddar cheese. The cheddar gets croken into chunks and dropped into the soup to melt.

* Except for the vegetarians and vegans obviously and I'm not going to say anything about them right now because I don't want to offend anyone honestly and vegetarian food can be delicious. But vegans??? How can anyone go through life without chocolate - it's not right. In fact I'd go so far as to say it's ALL WRONG!
** Can't be doing with Caerphilly which is what my mother prefers - too crumbly!
*** Yep, I even have an Italian uncle.

**** If you haven't got a saucepan big enough now is the time to get out the hacksaw. If you can't get mutton, lamb will do BUT mutton is better.

Happy Bloggy Birthday

It's my blog's birthday today. I gave it a card but forgot the cake, so I had to go and find one on Flickr ... hope it likes it.

If I am honest I really want to give it a makeover but I am so skint - MOT/car tax due tomorrow and so fussy - can't decide what look/style I like AND can't get one of these freebies to work.

It seems amazing that I've kept going with this - things never keep going for this length of time ... started in February 2005, that makes it 4 years old, that's right isn't it? I don't think I managed to keep a diary going for 1 year as a youngster, never mind 4 years! I think that it kept me sane in 2005 - the stress of planning and catering the wedding and then Simon and "the job"! So, I'm going to keep plodding on with it and see if I can't get it up to it's 5th birthday ~ it'll be able to start school then ;o)

Notes to self

Why oh why do you always leave it until the very last minute to book the MOT?? **Note to self** The car tax is due on Monday - do something now!!

Walkers new Chocolate and Chilli crisps ~ they're trying them out. You love chocolate and chilli. You tried them out! They are FOUL **Note to self** Stick to cheese and onion, they won't make your tongue shudder.

Your hair needs colouring! Your hair needs cutting. It's making you look that age you don't want to talk about that you're going to be in August. **Note to self** Ring "Hannah the hairdresser!"

The handle has just broken on your toothbrush! New toothbrushes were on the shapping list last week. You never leave your toothbrush this long. FFS?!?! **Note to self** Buy a new toothbrush Joanne!

Talking about him on the Internet when he has no idea I am .... ssssh!!!

Fi stole this one from Dooce. I stole it from her ~ doubly outrageous!

What are your middle names? Mine is Elizabeth - after my Nana ... at least I didn't get the her other name - Ethel! His middle name is Andrew ... both his brother (John after their dad) and his sister (Mary I think) were given middle names - for some reason (????) he wasn't ... so he chose his own as a teenager.

How long have you been together? Since September 1999 - my longest relationship and his too I believe.

How long did you know each other before you started dating? Technically we never dated, we met on Yahoo! Chat, he was living on the Isle of Man, I was in the SE of England and by the time we met in person, being a floozy, I just moved him straight in!

How old are each of you? I am 39, staring down the barrels of 40. He is gutted that for two weeks of May and the months of June, July and half of August he will be 12 years older than me.

Whose siblings do you see the most? His, H is just up the road in Balham.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple? His job - which he hates.

Did you go to the same school? No, I was born in South Wales and went to school in Gorseinon. He went to school in Brixton.

Are you from the same home town? No (see above) Simon is Clapham born and bred, I am from a small town near Swansea called Pontarddulais (pont-arr-th-ill-ice). Simon calls it pont-ar-diddly-ice! We fight about this!

Who is smarter? I wear better shoes than he does - enough of an answer for you?

Who is the most sensitive? Me, simple answer really.

Where do you eat out most as a couple? This might sound a daft answer but France. In general here we don't eat out. On holiday we do.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple? Northern Spain.

Who has the craziest exes? Him

Who has the worst temper? *cough* HIM! *cough*

Who does the cooking? We used to share the cooking fairly equally, now he does the majority of it. I am eternally grateful for this BUT wish I had more time i.e. could do more of it.

Who is the neat-freak? Neither of us to be honest.

Who is more stubborn? Him!

Who hogs the bed? Apparently *rolls eyeballs dramatically* me - I remain unconvinced.

Who wakes up earlier? Me ... I wish I didn't but!

Where was your first date? We went to the Hollywood Bowl restaurant in Gillingham. Surprisingly I don't remember what we ate. I ALWAYS remember what I ate!

Who is more jealous? Me

How long did it take to get serious? Once we met in person, next to no time. Did I mention up there I am a floozy?

Who eats more? Him, he's 6' 2" with hollow legs. Unfortunately it looks like I ate more because my metabolic rate is stuck at stop.

Who does the laundry? I do. He's not allowed as he chucks everything in together and then ALL of it in the tumble dryer!

Who's better with the computer? Umm ... about equals I'd say.

Who drives when you are together? Him, though quite often I find my feet reaching for the brake *coughs under breath* Schumaker!

So there you go, me and him, explained/moaned about. Got some answers of your own? Comments are just *points* down there ;o)
p.s. psst, seeing as this has already been stolen twice ... feel free to nick it from me!!

Scrapbooking

So, this weekend has mostly been about re-getting to know Photoshop Elements. Playing around with scraps and layers and making new headers, desk tops and just putting pictures together. VERY THERAPUTIC! I need to go and do something else now before my eyes turn square.

12" x 12" square in fact!

12" x 12" with knobs and bows on.

But hey it's keeping me off the drugs and the alcohol!!

Unconscious Mutterings #317

I say ... and you think ... ?

Carpet :: burn
William :: Tell
Oh! :: No!
Board game :: backgammon
Sunlight :: SPF
Delay :: flight
Winner :: loser
Concubine :: Emperor
Comatose :: deeply asleep
Satisfy :: enough

Do some muttering of your own here.

**mingle, mingle, mingle**

That’s My Answer’s Monthly Mingle: February 2009

There's some mingling going on over at That's My Answer ~ come on over and be social!

The new FOOD commandments

This month's Olive magazine has an article entitled "The Food Commandments" ~ interesting! Interesting for more than one reason. Commandment ~ something that must be obeyed; a command or edict. Should there be rules that must be obeyed in food? Shouldn't food be about likes/dislikes more than rules? Anyway let's put my need to ignore the rules to one side and look at what Olive suggests as the new commandments.

Thou shall not drink fancy bottled water
I'm not sure about this one ... at home we don't drink "fancy bottled water" ~ because let's face it there'd be no money for Navarra if we were drinking San Pellogrino every day. But I do buy bottled mineral water as it saves me filtering it ... the water here is so hard, it's enough to make me shudder. The water doesn't taste like this in Swansea. But back to the point I generally agree with this and if I am eating a meal out I shall not be drinking fancy bottled water I shall be asking for a glass of soda or tap water.

Thou shall not bow down to big brands but shop for price
This one's a bit harder - there are some things that have to be a certain brand ... ketchup and baked beans by Mr Heinz, rich tea biscuits by Mr Mcvitie, instant coffee by Mr Nescafe but that's about it. I am happy to schlep off to Lidl for the rest of my shopping - their Bavarian ham is to die for.

Thou shalt be more wary of thy carbon footprint
By this they meant in terms of not flying or driving when you go on foodie breaks. "Foodie breaks" - I wish! I get to go to France on holiday and the only reason I can afford that is that I get to stay with my lovely parents - in exchange for doing all the cooking whilst I am there - and when we eat out we go Dutch. But I do use the boat, not the plane. However having said all that I am going to Rosas in June and I have no doubt it will be quite foody.

Thou shalt remember that eating in is the new eating out
I love eating out BUT I also love eating in. I think that there is notheing nicer than feeding family/loved ones/friends and seeing them get pleasure out of the food that you are giving them. We even (with a little help) catered our own wedding.

Thou shalt shun food waste and remember "leftovers are cool"
I have always thought this and I am officially know in school as the leftover girl. My lunches are always either leftovers or homemade soup.

Thou shalt embrace shoulder of lamb as the new fillet steak
This I think is all about using the cheaper cuts of meat, taking a little more time with them, treating them gently and enjoying the sense of achievement that "real" cooking gives you. Not that I don't like fillet steak and chips BUT with fillet it's all about the texture and let's face it you're not going to get the same flavour as you would with say pot roasted brisket. I love shoulder of lamb - my mum would squeal about the fattiness of it but it's brilliant for cawl - see March 1st post for Auntie Marg's recipe - actually it's better with shoulder of mutton but that's really hard to get these days!

Thou shalt honour home-grown and homemade above all else
I suppose this is half true for me ... homemade yes, definitely. I'd much rather make everything myself than buy something ready prepared from the local supermarket. I have a teaching assistant in school who buys everything ready prepared ready to be zapped in the microwave. EVERYTHING! Lasagne, pizza, fish pie, toad-in-the-hole, she even buys burgers already in the bun to zap!! NO I say NO! Why, when it's so easy to chuck a couple of handfuls of minced beef/pork/lamb in a bowl, mix in an egg yolk, some breadcrumbs and whatever herbs and spices you fancy, mix and grill. And then you know what you're eating. It's nutritious and healthy and not crap for you.
Unfortunately home-grown is not as easy. I do grow herbs and this year I am going to try tomatoes on the balcony in grow bags BUT what would happen during the summer? It's all very well and good to ask a neighbour to water your courgettes if you're away for 10 days BUT when you're away for 6 weeks, it's a bit of a cheek. So no, not home-grown I'm afraid. However when I am away for the 6 weeks lots of the veg there is home-grown ... all the usuals ~ onions, courgettes, beans, tomatoes, figs and cherries. Farmer Don is on the case.

Thou shalt support the local
Yes, oh yes. Local producers are the bees knees. I go to the farm shops in Rainham and at Broadditch Farm - love their Prince Charmings @ squash time. I pick Kentish strawberries in the summer and I'm anyones for a farmer's market. I find localfoodadvisor.com invaluable.

Thou shalt go just a little bit veggie
That's not so difficult for me - I was a vegetarian for about 6 yrs in my late teens and early twenties until a late night pub crawl and a visit to Steak by Night that brought me back to my senses. So I like vegetarian food - well until you mention tofu that is but I digress. Vegetables are quite often the star of the show when I eat, be it in a curry, roasted with balsamic vinegar or just a damn good salad.
My husband however is a whole other ball game! When we first lived together Simon counted tomatoes/onions on a pizza as vegetables. He would eat carrots, peas, sweetcorn and pizza topping and that was about it. We've progressed in the last 10 years. He'll manage parsnips and beetroot now, green beans and occasionally a Brussels sprout BUT that's about it. He hates squash (??), wont touch courgettes (??) and won't even try asparagus or sprouting broccoli (???). And then there's the lentils/beans/pulses part of vegetarianism - lentils probably, the rest of it - only if it's in chili CON carne.

Thou shalt wise up to food jargon
Organic? Free-range? Do we believe what's on the label? What in fact is the difference between a "free-range egg" and "an egg from birds that have been allowed to range freely"? And which should I be buying? Check the Internet I say.

So, for the main part, I like these new food commandments but I think that I'd like to add one of my own ...

Thou shalt love and enjoy the food you eat!

What do you think?